When my parents decided to come and stay with me, I was sure that I was one of the luckiest daughters, blessed with the opportunity to take care of her father during his last days. My father was bedridden and we had to perform dialysis at home for him. I thought I was behaving like the perfect daughter - giving him his medicines, doing the dialysis, and taking care of every need of his. This illusion was broken one day, when my father suddenly called me and asked me to sit near him. I sat next to him and he just held my hands tightly and told me "I am so happy that you are doing everything for me, but why am I also feeling sad that there is no human touch involved in whatever you are doing?". This was a huge blow to my ego and I realized that whatever I had been doing for him was just a duty, like something any nurse or doctor would have done for him. I had completely ignored the fact that I could do more for him as a daughter- by holding his hands or giving him a hug.
More often than not,we think that having an aged person at home, cooking for them, giving them their medicines or just giving them a place to stay is enough. How many times do we spend a few minutes exclusively with them or sitting next to them? Even if we spend time talking to them, we don't touch them , pat them or hold hands.......At their age, loneliness could be a killing factor and human touch could do wonders for their psyche. But in this materialistic world, we don't show our affection, care or treat them like they are wanted. We forget that old age is just a few years down the line for us too and that we we could be facing a similar situation ourselves. Take a moment to think whether we would like to be treated the way they are treated....Is that what we want from our children too?
Do we ever realize that all people would want at that age is really nothing but a display of affection? They are like small kids who want to be showered with love. An aged person- especially a single parent, in-law, aunt or uncle- doesn't need our gifts or presents , but only a few moments of companionship to show that we care for them. And a human touch is enough to make them feel wanted.
2 comments:
I agree. In the current days most of us thing it is our duty to help old people. In the buzz of too much activity , we forget the human touch as you mention.
It is not only old people , nowadays , when taking care of our children also , it has become more of duty than human touch.
When my dughter calls in the night to say good night , just being with her for 2 mts gives a feeling of satisfaction which is not got just by doing what they want
Chandy
very true manni! i already had a belief that human touch and luv gives happiness and secured feeling to many. This one, i saw in person when my grandma was bedridden, i use to hold her hands and talk, i sometimes fed her also. she used to hold my hands tight and listen to my talking!i could c her happiness when i hold her hands even at that stage. During this stage only, i realised that what i had in belief, is very true. Nothing can overcome a human touch and luv for bringing a secured feeling and happiness! its not only just old people, it can also bring happiness to anyone at any age around you.i too want to be like this only and hoping to do so.
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